Monday, 14 December 2009

Of turning glances

Direction is such a relative concept, going one way or the other has more to do with thinking things through than letting your feet do all the work. And unfortunately, thinking takes time, willingness and resources, all of which you may be too tired to distribute for a measly choice of either/or. A quick rock/paper/scissors game of chance can do the trick just as well, we all know that. We call it spontaneity, intuition, quick thinking, this random on-the-spot decision which sometimes proves to be rightly efficient.

Moreover, direction requires coordinates and thus, coordination, that ellusive capacity to judge the width, height, volume, density and impact of your actions so as to calculate the consequences (or repercussions if the case may be... and it all too often is). Just going through life bestows upon us the responsibility of getting well-acquainted with mathematics. You know, 1+1=stay home today, a sort of personal horoscope that gives us predictions of what may/might happen if we get out of/on the wrong side of the bed this morning. 'I just know I'll have a rotten day today, I have this thing going on and then the meeting and heaven knows what else'. Yeah, just one of those days.

And because of the smart evolved primates we claim ourselves to be (here's a sobriquet for us, a bunch of Bubbles and this fits in quite well with the more post-modern part in us who mourns the loss of our creator - not that Michael Jackson was our creator, I'm not implying that... although come to think of it, the '80s have never been the same post-MJ and we all secretly wish we could do the Thriller dance at our wedding or at least make our puppet-guests do it to amuse us as we chuckle behind Chinese bamboo silk-embroidered fans all the while cursing our second-thoughtedness that persuaded us not to send the wigs to the dry-cleaners and now it itches so baaaaadly), according to some theories, we grant life to everything we touch... literally. And it's a curse, we're cousins twice removed of Midas. Which should make us all disgusted with the deprived inbreeding we've been proliferating and which would indeed account for most genetic accidents on this earth. Coming back to my recently sharpened point, we people tend to do this thing called synecdoche, a sort of pars pro toto I don't think we're in Kansas anymore. Whatever we touch comes into our possession and becomes an extension of us. Just keep your extensions to yourself would be my only advice. We invest in whatever we think/hope to be ours or whatever we desire. We invest time and daydreams, hopes and futuristic expectations into these extensions and feed them, extending them to the furthest reaches of impossibility, ending up living a life that is completely unreal, which disappoints us every moment, as it's perpetually confronted with what is.

So we set ourselves up for disappointment because we're not good at maths. Darn our lack of numerical skills and life of fantasy we prefer over grey fact-of-lifedness. Welcome to 'Statements on the mundane'...

Of all the things that extend from us to others, one of the most deadly weapons we possess is that furtive glance that can draw them in or crush the rooftop of our personalised Disneyworld. Careful when riding the rollercoaster of winks, peeps and ganders. I'm a victim of such eyeball mishaps. Then again, who isn't. Here's lookin' atchoo, kid!

Friday, 11 December 2009

Permission to ramble

Relating to another post, I realized how dull a sitcommy (which btw reminds me of something else I found amusing and as this is a rant, I can stray from the - ironically enough - subject of the - mandatorily ironic - rant: in a comment of said beloved and treasured and cherished blogger's blog which has recently come back to life from the unliving, as it can't die so it could never be undead, it was just suspended from existence pretty much like supermodels whose lives become void of any meaning except for their jobs of presenting lingerie and skimpy clothing much like a dummy, the dumb kind, there was much amazement and awe at a suffixed noun come adjective that looked like a darling combination but struck confusing dabblings in the hearts and synapses of others; the word formation in question is 'femmy' and I must say I found it scrumptious... then again I got the meaning and punniness if any, I got it and kept it to myself, ha ha!) life I have. And it's about to be renewed for a new season, lest the main actor (actrice) of infinite fame (in her own universe) should suffer life-threatening events pertaining to her livelihood.

To be continued...
*stares pensively the other way - any other way but the one you're looking*

Monday, 11 May 2009

Cause we love puns

Literally so much fun...
The site is self-explanatory so enough about that.
A few days ago I found someone's rant about the sky and how beautiful it is, full of clouds and shades, nuances and ideas floating around in ether, undisturbed except by some flimsy zephir (in this perfect weather). Somehow I find myself walking outside in the evenings and I get to admire and beware the big full moon. Apparently I'm not the only one in this terrified-awe state, the clouds are as well. There were none in the night sky. Even the darkened sky was too afraid to contrast with the fullness of the moon so it eased up ever so slightly. Just like the school bully enters the school yard, every sickly, fat, pimply, dorky unfortunate soul unlucky enough to be within 50 feet of The School Bully. The guy's got a reputation to maintain so it's not personal, beating the magical fairy dust out of you... I'm sure you'll understand, respectfully yours.
Is the moon mooning us? The big bully in the sky...

Monday, 17 November 2008

Anime be tomorrow

The latest best in the anime world:
Soul Eater - awesome, has my fave, Stein, in it
Chaos Head - this one has a particularly catchy ending and the plot is actually new and interesting
Kannagi - you'd never guess that the dance sequence was done by the guy who did the Haruhi dance... nooo, it's totally different, promise...
The first two have a great storyline, the last one has an OP that has nothing to do with the actual plot. Which reminds me... another anime with a mind-rape plot twist at the very end of the FIRST EP: Ga Rei Zero. But it's worth it, if only for the motorbike scene.
You addicts can get eps from here. Don't forget to thank me ;)
Oh... and 3D animation... it's bad... like really, stop it, it's really bad!

Thursday, 30 October 2008


Milk is what I'd Like to Drink... my Calcium intake cannot be quenched as thoroughly as with milk. It's so awesome I can't find the words... So I'll (don't look down) tube say it:

The benefits of milk have never sounded so appealing, yes?

Friday, 24 October 2008

Youtube me like there's no tomorrow!

How I'm feeling today... want to know? I'll tell you... It's... well... oh wait, I can show it to you with a youtube vid!
Tubetalk is starting to get on my nerves. Whether it's a mood (yes, I mispelled it as "lood"... I felt very loody, there! lame mood... spell fail...), a feeling or a state of mind, youtube has a video for it.
There's links all over the place. Either you're lazy or not too articulate, the answer for you would start with *Muttley groan I decided NOT to youtube*

Happy Dead Space Day!

What other innovations can one bring to the world of gaming?
An array of guns that most armies would be proud to have, precision and accuracy that make headshots spectacular and competitive, blood and gore to rival the most high-budget horror film, graphics to mess up your so-called top of the line computer. Quite an attractive package, isn't it?
What could one do to better it? I mean, there's only so many times you can shoot someone... or is there?
I can tell you now that Dead Space did bring quite a lot of innovations. Among them are some ingenoius yet inevitable progressions. Yes, the plotline is all too well-known: you go into outer space to help out some stranded people on a spaceship (planet cracker that's destroyed 34 planets... yay human technology!). You get there after a not-so-smooth landing, your engine is damaged, lost upon further inspection. You realize something "terribly wrong" happened there and that you don't know if you can help. The place is deserted, some of your mates die within the first 5 minutes... yadda yadda yadda.
Buut here's where some new additions make it more appealing: your healthbar is conveniently located on the spine of your armour, your player always stays on screen and you have a 360 degree range of revolving around your character. Messages, be them text/video/audio logs do not cut in the game, you're still playing while they are up on the screen. The controls do take a bit of getting used to and you do feel rather dumb healing every time you want to open a door... facepalm moments sprinkled here and there.
One of the newest most sadistic thing is how to kill your necromorph alien mutant enemies. Shoot them, you'd say twitching an index at me. Oh yes, you do that... and get stabbed in the spine when it respawns limbs!!! Ah yes, the way to kill the... dead people corrupted by an alien unitarian marker who turn into alien necromorphs... things is to shoot/stomp/cut off all their limbs. That will stop them.... and kill a bit more of your humanity.
The blood actually bubbles when the darling creatures get dismembered! Oh, detail, what would virtual reality (the bad world gone psychotic side of it at least) be without you! I mean we're all tired of killing badly pixellated characters, we want everything to be more realistic, to have a feel that someone suffers for our extinct social lives.
ARMY NOW RECRUITING NERDS FOR SNIPER CAREER (no dudes, neeeever gonna happen, put the controller down and go in a wide populated space that IS NOT (anywhere near) a convention!.... aaand your fly is open...)